Four Eyes

When I was in 3rd grade, I tried my best to make it seem like I couldn’t see very well when I went to my first optometrist appointment.

“Can you read this line?” the doctor asked.

I don’t recall what letters and numbers were up on the wall, but I could see them clearly and was really peeved by my super amazing vision. So I just pretended it was all too problematic for me.

“Um… A… L…. H, K… uh… I think that’s a U…” and so on and so forth.

I should have probably said, “I can’t tell what that one is” or just say another letter in its place. But at the end of my appointment, the doctor said I had 20/20 vision and didn’t need glasses. I was crushed. I wanted to wear glasses sooooo badly! I know it sounds sort of odd, like what kid wants to wear glasses? What an effin’ weirdo! But I’ve always thought glasses were cool — my mom has always worn glasses, therefore I thought they were cool. The fact that I didn’t need to wear glasses didn’t necessarily mean I couldn’t wear glasses, so I got a fake pair from Claire’s. And in high school I wore some fake Calvin Klein ones my mom bought at the flea market. They made me feel so chic. 🙂

I got my first pair of prescription glasses when I was 18. And my eyes were SUPER effed up thanks to staring at the computer screen for long periods of time — one eye was farsighted while the other was nearsighted. How does that even happen? But within a year my vision improved, and since then I’ve only had a light reading prescription. I’ve had friends try on my glasses and ask if they’re fake, but I swear they’re not!

Anywho, I picked out a pair of new ones a few weeks ago and I’m all excited! My last pair of glasses have been MIA since February and I’ve had them for 3 years, but my eyeballs have been doing alright. I tend to wear a faux pair of horn rimmed glasses (the kind I originally wanted 3 years ago, but the woman helping me out with glasses said they were too big for my face, and a year later every woman and their mother were wearing them. Thanks, hipsters! /sarcasm) that have made many appearances on my blog. When I was still at SFSU, I heard this one girl ask why people wear fake glasses when they don’t even need a prescription. I was slightly offended as I was wearing my fake glasses as she was saying that, and also I like having something on my face. I feel weird without glasses, even though I don’t need them as much as others might.

I’m rambling. What was the point of this post? Oh yeah, new glasses! So, I picked out tortoise shell colored frames by Brooks Brothers which look pretty similar to my faux ones. I was all excited, but then I got a message from my doctor’s office asking what color I wanted them in. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WHAT COLOR? I thought it just comes in tortoise. But no. It also comes in olive and black. I took black out of the equation (I hope that doesn’t sound racist) and found myself being torn between olive and tortoise.

WHICH ONE DO I WANT?

They both don’t look too different from one another, so making a decision became even more difficult! I called the optometrist earlier this morning, but the woman who helped me was with a patient at the time so I thought, “Awesome, more time to think!!!” I settled on tortoise, but when she called me back I said olive. I don’t know what happened.

Either pair should be fine, plus the olive pair look sort of forest-y and have a golden hue, which looks pretty nice… I think. o,0